By Blair Glaser

In a recent forum, a powerful thinker asked, “Who would you have to disappoint or abandon in order to devote yourself to your art this year?”

It is a challenging question. It makes us think about those we depend on and who are dependent on us, and where that dependency might be a little crippling. It may reveal whose approval we are tied into. It reminds us that there are people whose feelings we consider, people we care about deeply.

Many of us do tend to consciously and unconsciously curtail our growth, personal and /or professional, because…

By Tor Constantino

Both of my daughters had ballet lessons for a year or two when they were younger. But as I think back about it, I never saw a young boy in any of the practices or recitals.

I never thought much about that until I wrote a couple of articles for The Good Men Project asserting that ballet is more of a sport than other activities such as bowling, billiards, darts, poker…etc.

Those articles got me thinking that within youth ballet, there seemed to be a stark lack of boys — -the future of ballet requires boys now.

…

By Vernon Lindsay, Ph.D.

Dear Mr. Failure,

How are you? Despite your return to my life yesterday, I am well. To borrow a phrase from Les Brown, I am better than good and better than most.

I am writing this letter to thank you. Yesterday, I received a rejection letter from an academic journal. I submitted an article for publication, and the editor decided it did not fit with the vision of the journal’s audience.

I can’t lie. When I opened the email with the decision letter, I was disappointed. I put a lot of time and effort into writing…

By Sarah and Samantha (Never Be Average)

As time passes after a breakup, and wounds begin to heal, it is easy to forget why you left your ex in the first place. Subtle memories come back to you, but not enough to convince you that you made the right decision. Things like how she always left her makeup all over the counter, or how she spent too much money every time she went to Nordstrom. Or, how she always criticized you for having that extra slice of pizza.

What you choose to forget is how she always gave you a…

By Sandy Weiner

You’re talking on the phone for the first time, and he says a few things that make you feel uncomfortable. She has a tone of voice that irks you, especially when she’s bashing her ex. You push those red flags aside, because there are things you like about him/her.

“She’s so beautiful, I’ll just ignore the fact that she’s been complaining about her boss for the past five minutes.” “He’s a doctor. He saves people’s lives. I’ll just ignore that comment he made about how his ex is a horrible person who wiped out his bank account.”

…

By Chaz Thorne

“In my family, really, in my culture, divorce isn’t acceptable. Weddings are a big deal as they represent the coming together of two families. And when the marriage comes apart… Well, let’s just say it’s considered deeply shameful. It took me months to tell my parents.”

- Ravi

One of my favorite writers, Brené Brown, covers the topic of shame extensively in her work.

Importantly, Brown points out, though guilt and shame seem similar they’re quite distinct. And shame is significantly more destructive.

Guilt is the feeling you did something bad. …

By John Harris

Some men are terrible with friendships.

With women, they are often taught to see any connection or common interest as sexual chemistry, an invitation for sexual exploit. This is why when women sincerely just want a man as a human friend, it is considered “friend-zoning”.

With men, they are threatened by perceived masculinity. It becomes more difficult for men to show emotional vulnerability the more threatening the other man’s masculinity appears to be. In the last six months, I’ve had no fewer than nine different guys privately express to me how threatened they feel by my masculinity. They are reluctant to bring women…

By Chris Estey

If you had to guess, how much time do you spend thinking about the past? What about the present? The future? During a recent conversation with my wife, I realized something I had never thought about before: about 95% of my thoughts are about the future. But when I stop to think about it, most of the conversations I have with other people, they are discussing events that have either already taken place or just happened.

It makes sense. Something that just happened or is happening right now makes for easy small talk. Plans, predictions, and thoughts…