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By The Good Men Project Editors
Contribute to one of our Good Men Project publications on Medium — Hello Love (Relationships), Change Becomes You (Advice), Equality Includes You (Social Justice), A Parent is Born (Parenting), and Greener Together (Environmentalism).
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We invite Medium authors to submit their relevant, non-fiction stories (no poetry, please) to one of our five (5) publications on Medium, whether your Medium story is new…
How I left a man I was addicted to.
By Alice Lundy
My dear Transition Man, I acted irrationally toward you; I did it for me.
For all the times I put myself second and the man on my menu first. I acted irrationally toward you because I needed to burn the bridge which walked me into your life when you weren’t free and I was vulnerable.
For too many years with too many men, I rose above — the cool cucumber to their belittlements. I took insults in stride and reacted as rationally as my ego would allow. I refused to be taken down. …
When some declare that no line is too far to cross — the rest of us will be here to defend that line together.
I thought we had an agreement here.
Human beings are supposed to have a bottom: a base level of decency that defines us, a place we will not go to because to go there would mean abandoning the very moral givens that tether us to one another — and slipping into inhumanity.
We are expected as participants in community to have some ethical boundaries that hedge us in and prevent the very worst of our tendencies from festering to the point they grow toxic and metastasize within us and among us.
We live in this world every…
ADHD is not a deficit disorder. It is a distinction driver.
By Sean Swaby
Why is it that ADHD is defined by deficits rather than strengths? The current definition for ADHD is Attention DEFICIT Hyperactivity DISORDER.
It is time to own and declare our many strengths because people with ADHD are like a Swiss Army Knife:Our potential expands every time we take on a project.
A strengths based definition of ADHD
A: Attention — You can pay attention when you have the structure and support that you need.
D: Distinction — Your abilities are numerous and you define yourself by your strengths and successes. You are unique and distinct from others.
H: Helpability — You are creative…
Whenever my sons laugh until they fall over, disappear into a make-believe game or run across the room to hug me, I’m reminded of the glory of childhood.
One of the greatest things about being a parent is the constant reminder of what is so awesome about being a kid.
And while I realize that nobody is stopping me from doing any of these things now that I’m a grown-up, there is a very specific joy to being a little boy that I truly do not think can be duplicated in adulthood.
With that in mind, I offer a list of fifteen things my two little boys have, of which I’m insanely jealous.
1. Body Pride
Lying on the couch completely naked while eating freeze-dried strawberries and watching…
It takes a moment of impact to shatter your fear.
“One minute!” The Black Hat boomed from up near the front of the bird.
“One minute.” Every man and woman on the aircraft echoed back to the soldier behind them.
We were standing up, our static lines hooked to the overhead cable, and the weight of the parachute and reserve felt more real than ever. I was staring intently at the red light near the Jump Master. The moment it turned green, I knew nothing would ever be the same. I was in Airborne School at Ft. Benning, Georgia, and I was nineteen years old.
I…
Richard Gatley reminds us that men do feel emotions but often lack the training to express them.
She was crushed.
Her daughter had rejected her offer to babysit her granddaughter for the fifth time. Her body trembled as she collapsed in tears, torn by grief, in final acceptance of her daughter’s distain for her.
She was inconsolable, as her husband discovered when he found her sitting in a chair in their little kitchen, her head in her hands, resting on the kitchen table, shaken by paroxysms of tears.
He felt her grief rip through him as he approached. He was repelled, afraid of its terrible power. He feared for his wife’s sanity, so engaged…
You may receive a better outcome than you ever imagined.
How often have we had an expected outcome of how things should work? I received the most unusual positive experience after praying for guidance on whether to stay in a relationship or not. Many years ago, I was trying to figure out my next step in dealing with a narcissistic bully who also had a problematic drinking problem. I knew that I had to leave this relationship because he could have killed me during one of his many blackouts. Could I continue to pull him off of me when he was choking me during his alcoholic blackouts…
Mom Christine Walker has wisdom and advice for her son as he grows into manhood. She shares it in this letter.
My Dear Son,
I know you think that because I’m your mom, and a woman, I don’t have anything to teach you about manhood, but I do. Women see things that men don’t always talk about. I want to share them with you as you embark on your journey to manhood.
Grown men make friends, but they rarely make close friends. Do whatever you can to keep the friends you make while you are young. The friends who see you cry in middle school, and don’t abandon you, will always have your back. They will be there…
Every kind of depression should be handled with care, not taken lightly. You are important and your mental health matters.
By Laura Becker
Do you know what Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD, is?
It’s a type of depression that’s brought on by a lack of sunlight. It usually hits during the fall and winter months, and it can hit hard. SAD can, less often, bring about dark moods in the spring and summer. It is recurrent during a specific season for at least two years.
But SAD is not about a lack of sunlight only. Serotonin — a neurotransmitter — and melatonin — a natural neurotransmitter-like compound — can also play roles in developing this disorder.
Don’t ever let anyone…
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