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The Five Stages of Grief and Loss in Divorce
When a marriage dies and sadness hits, it’s the sadness that will heal you.
I started crying at the café counter of Barnes & Noble last Sunday. Not just a little tear, but full-on body-racking sobs. I was buying my kids croissants, had managed to get them out of the house with minimal bickering, bribed by books and French pastry. I’d been chatting with the cashier, grabbed the food and turned to go sit down when she called me back to the counter.
“Ma’am, I don’t think your card went through.”
I immediately realized why — I didn’t swipe my card. My wallet was in my purse. It was yet the fifth or sixth thing I’d done that morning that smacked of exhaustion, disorientation, losing my grip. And, I started to cry. There in front of that poor girl who’s compassion was so immediate as to make the tears come all the more.
“Oh, ma’am,” she said with kindness, “do you need a napkin?”
“No,” I whimpered, looking down, “it’s just, no. It’s just, thank you. I’m OK, hard day.”
I collected myself and went to sit with my boys. They were eating and reading, their two favorite things, but noticed my demeanor. Both reached over to hug me, give a kiss, and share a bite…
